NYC’s public phones on the mend: NYNEX rolls out new ‘401K’ plan.

NYNEX preening its new 401K street phones. (The new 401 phone banks are said to include complimentary sustenance, Artisinal art, and packing supplies.)

In a scene lifted straight from “Revenge of the Donuts” fancy iPhone carriers were seen queuing up before NYNEX payphone banks around Manhattan this Friday, eager to partake in what the vendor is calling “that warm, summery feeling of analog dialing.” With their iPhones held adroitly in Airplane mode, career cell-phone veterans waited patiently to put their coins in the machines and call their friends.

Jared Tollhurst (Entertainments and events coordinator, 24, a self-identifying ‘steam punk’ and resident of Colonial Williamsburg, Brooklyn) said that he had been planning ‘all week’ to call his buddies back at his flat (in Colonial Williamsburg, Brooklyn).  “I’m interested in history and the original forms of things,” said Tollhurst.  “Vinyl, off-set printing, lathing, luge-running, barometric jogging, and near-term speed-home-brewing.  And I know those bitches ain’t doing nothing but day-trading and playing Mario Karts so they’ll be psyched!”

In a curious offshoot of the suddenly piqued interest amongst non-payphone users, many Salvadorean, Mexican, Dominican, Jamaican, Trinidadian, Colombian, Yemeni, Cuban, and other payphone and calling card ‘regulars’ found themselves without phone service on Friday, sources closer to those other people said.

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